nobody gets defensive about things they are certain about though.
we defend things we are certain about.
and at face value, perhaps defending something and being defensive could just be considered different words for the same thing. but i am convinced that they are different words for different things, that challenged convictions can result in one or the other.
if we defend, we have answers.
if we are defensive, we are often speechless.
if we defend, we do so patiently.
if we are defensive, we often do so frustratedly.
defending is done with understanding.
defensiveness is often played out in anger.
if we are defenders, there is tolerance in action and speech because we are sure of our convictions being justifiable.
if we get defensive, we exalt others to tolerance, blame others for misunderstanding, and our actions and speech reflect attempts to justify the uncertainty of our own convictions.
at least this has been my experience.
in it all, the difference in response does reflect something of our own personhood.
and of the things we hold dear.
and how they have come to occupy that high place in our hearts.
and why they continue to be things we cling to.
or whether maybe they are realised as things we actually need to change, or refine, or simply let go of.
we are fickle creatures and too easily take things for granted. convictions included.
so our defensiveness can be neither here nor there.
but some things are worth defending, with patience and understanding and tolerance.
things like the truth.
and if the root of defensiveness is shaken certainty, then defending has to start with being certain.
it has to start with really knowing the things we know.
really knowing the things we know as truth, not uncertainty.
if nothing else, i want to really know that jesus christ is lord.
